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Wednesday, April 10, 2013

"The Boy" - a short story about suicide

The Boy...

I saw a male child laying there. Alone in the shadows. He had dark black hair that blended in with the darkness around him. His eyes were mislead, blind to what was happening to him. It was very(prenominal) cold wherever this boy was. I could see his tip being blown away from his lungs, like an ice-cold overturn being released from its cage. He was shaking in fear. But what was he so afraid of? The boy had his eyes closed. It appeared like he was sleeping, but in a way he seemed so awake. Curiosity persuaded me to watch what happened to him. All I could see was his lonely, sleek, clay laying in the shadows. A single spotlight cover his whole self, but everywhere is was pitch black. This young boy looked so familiar to me. I swear I had seen him somewhere, maybe Ive even met with him. But in the same way he looked like a complete stranger. He was engulfed in the colorless cage where he lay. Was he dreaming? His body move with fright like he was the victim of a perverted fate. The curiosity was too strong. I took a dive inwardly the boys mind to get a closer look active this being. I thought the best place to start was his past.

There was the boy. He looks about the age of 5 or 6. He was ingress a rickety house. He walked inside, and silently shut the doorsill behind him. He moved his lips and said something, but I couldnt hear him. He called out again. Was he talking to soulfulness? He dropped his backpack to the ground, and rushed into a kitchen. A noblewoman stood there, I figure it was his Mom. She looked worried about something, and the...

Your writing expression was full of sorrow and yet. approximately poetic. This essay, though it is short, really held my oversight from beginning to end. I applaud you!

when i pronounce this stiff essay it brought me to the edge of my seat. i was touched by the spoken communication and it gave me a mental image of what was going on. it was like denotation a novel. very talented, keep them coming.

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This was an incredibly beautifully compose entrap. You have managed to evoke a deep sense of sense and really do a great job of draught the reader in.

Really impressive mesh - hope to read more soon.

this is such a life-threatening peice, i almost cried! tihs is the best thing i read so farther today, you did an outstand job, im blow away by the detail, and how real this seemed, i could attend the boy get hit by the dad and when he hugged his mother, you did a great job, keep up the great work!

First of all this isnt an essay, its a short story. Its a good piece of writing, evocative etc, but it lacks.

You make me opinion like I am inside the story! Well written and good choice of words! I only spotted a couple of past-present tense mistakes

This story is one of the best I have ever read. It contains great emotion. I could easily feel empathy for the boy. The ending sent chills up my spine.

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